When I hit publish today, I will officially have 100 posts to my name. It’s a big number for me, the most undisciplined journal writer in the universe. I feel like I should do something special in commemoration. Maybe post a video of Shiva’s latest trick? Instead of typing, record a vlog of my blithering? Give away that autographed portrait of my dog nobody in their right mind would want? Saber a bottle of champagne in real-time?
Actually, that last option sounds like a lot of fun. Hmmm…
All of these utterly fantastic ideas are going to have to be saved for another time because today all I can think about are my nerves.
We have a super-gigantic-astronomical weekend coming up at Shiva speed.
First, there is our normal Saturday agility class. Each session has gotten more technically difficult and I find my handling skills are being put to the test more than ever. The biggest thing for me lately is learning to think on my feet. I can plan out every course in my mind, visualize the heck out of how I want to run, but if something goes awry – such as my dog taking the jump from a different side during a Snookers course – I have been unable to change my strategy mid-stride. With a wacko dog like the one I’m stuck with, this is a huge problem. I don’t care how many points we rack up but getting whistled off the course sucks. It makes me worry I am never going to be able to complete a run properly.
If only Shiva was my tenth agility dog and not my first.
Secondly, right after class we have another workshop in Grand Desert. This one is all about learning to keep a cool head when trialing. Hah! Could it be any timelier? My husband is a seasoned athlete. He thrives in a competitive setting. I wilt like the sickly bush in front of our house. My nerves have long been my greatest nemesis. Along with my fears, natural tendency towards cowardice, and high-heeled shoes. I am hoping this workshop will give me some resources to turn to when I’d rather dive inside the chute with my dog.
Thirdly, my husband’s work Christmas party is on Saturday night. Hopefully after all this agility-ing Shiva will be so exhausted she will just sleep the whole time we are out of the house. Hopefully. Hopefully I will be so revved from learning wonderful new techniques that I won’t be nervous about having to actually talk to people I don’t know. Strangers. Hopefully.
Fourthly, Sunday morning is the CAANS fun match we have been waffling about attending. It would be a good idea to, you know, get in a practice trial before we decide when to enter a real-life-there-is-no-getting-out-of-this event. It should give us an idea where we stand and what we most need to work on. Other than weaves because I know those suck. (Stupid weaves, boooooooo.) The fun match may also just be, well, fun! There will be others we know there who will laugh along with us as Shiva systematically designs her own course. The only thing is it is early in the morning. Early in the morning after an employee Christmas party. Getting there could be a challenge.
Fifthly, I wanted to get our Christmas tree this weekend and get the rest of our decorations put up. You think we’re going to have the energy?
Jeepers, I’m exhausted now just looking at everything I’ve typed. No where in there do I see napping on the couch or reading a book under my favourite blanket. I don’t even see scarfing holiday cookies. This doesn’t bode well for my anxiety. Just saying.